Thursday, July 10, 2008

An Open Letter to Matt Jones

Dearest Matt,

What is the meaning of this?! Have you lost your mind? I am so disappointed in you. All this time I've thought you were such a goody goody and now you've shown yourself to be no better than Whitney Houston. Cocaine is whack.

I have secretly stalked you for lo these many years, but I will not be one of those women who send in marriage proposals to CRIMINALS. You've thrown away our entire future together. What the crackcrap?! It's almost like you don't even care what I think.

It's over,


P.S. That picture makes your head look tiny and I liked you better with long hair. Get acquitted and grow your hair back and we can talk about a reconciliation.


Roz said...

Who is Matt Jones?

Mercy's Maid said...

Oh no you didn't! :)

He was the quarterback for the Razorbacks a few years ago and I hearted him. Then he went to play in the NFL for the Jacksonville Jaguars. Then he got arrested for cocaine.

In a nutshell.

Pamela said...

he looks like Patrick (Sponge Bob, which I'm getting acquainted with via the grandkids)

sol92258 said...

he played for the Razorbacks
or is it floozy???