Teenage Mutant Ninja Kitties

My neighborhood is chock full of feral cats. It's more than a little disturbing. Have you ever seen that Stephen King-based movie where there are zillions of cats? It's kind of like that. Every morning as I drive to work they're darting to and fro in front of my car, just begging me to "help control the pet population". They jump in and out of the little sewer drainage thingy. I'm pretty sure they've teamed up with the Ninja Turtles...or maybe they've eaten Splinter. (Oh well, at least Elaine will know who Splinter is).

Anyway, these vermin are always hanging out around my house. Pooping in my flower bed and other displaying other annoying behaviors. The other day when we went outside to inspect the festive decorations on the outside of the house, one of them darted out from behind one of my bushes. I nearly messed myself.

Yesterday when I got home from work, my garland was in a heap on the porch. It's my belief that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Kitties are to blame. I can only hope that as they pulled the garland down, the magnets hit them in their heads and caused them brain damage. Perhaps they will wander off to terrorize another neighborhood and forget how to get back to my house.

At any rate, we're adding more magnets to help hold the garland. Magnets from a hard drive. You have to understand that this is a very high tech garland. The current magnets are attached to the garland with wires from a cat-5 cable. I swear my living room looked like a bomb making factory the other day.