Monday, March 24, 2008

A Letter of Angsty Apology

Dear Mr. Cadbury,

I was wrong. I thought I could break up with you this Easter, and I tried. Oh how I tried. But in the end, I could not face the prospect of going without your most excellent mini-eggs for a whole year. Without you, I am thinner nothing.

But you are a fickle mistress mister! When I came crawling back to you the night before Easter, you shunned me. It was spiteful of you to make me have an emotional breakdown in Target. Really, it was. You knew only the family size bag would do, but instead, you had to rub it in my face that I tried to break up with you. You meted out your candies in snack size offerings. Two for $5?! Why did you make me pay so dearly? Do you know how many snack size packages it takes to equal a family size bag? I don't either! But I have a feeling that I spent $10 on less than a family size portion. Who says you can't put a price on love?

I was kidding myself thinking I could leave you. I can't. I won't. Please take me back.

Yours forever,
Me

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

You so funny...
some of my favorite commercials were the ones where they had the rabbit on the screen with chicken sounds, then the bunny moved off screen with the cadbury egg behind him, as if he'd lay a foil wrapped chocolatey-goodness egg- they put the foil on later, of course :)

Pamela said...

I went on strike...didn't go shopping. So I didn't eat any cadbury eggs. I'm in withdrawal.

Glad you ate one for me.

Sassy said...

Cadbury eggs are nasty. You need a 12 step program!

Mercy's Maid said...

I will not abide such vile comments on my blog!

Anonymous said...

Yeah I am pretty sure I ate about two entire bags of those in the course of a week.